Tuesday, August 2, 2011

All this weird beauty thrown right at me

I keep hoping towards some end result that might not even be the right one so I forget the process. I see my current circumstances as means to an end instead of something I should be truly enjoying. I feel like I am entitled to more, yet I am not. I don't even deserve what I have now. Yet God is so good and so graceful. God's goodness is an overflowing fountain. With coke, not water. With manzanita sol and everything better. I am so quick to ask for more and so slow to be thankful for - and even to recognize - what I have already been given. I shouldn't try to commandeer the story God is writing for me, but I should learn to steer and learn to see and learn to thank him for everything He's given me now.

So this is me letting go and letting God. This is me moving on.
This is me with so much more peace than I've experience all year, to be able to look up and say "We have progress," instead of "Houston, we have a problem."

If you could see me, whoever I am.

This is me saying there is no excuse to not live to my fullest extent. I will worship while I'm waiting. Even while I'm waiting, there are still praises to be sung.

Life is truly a series of journeys. We never stop moving, we never stop searching. The moment we stop is the moment we've given up and the moment we've given up is the moment we die. Unless we vow to shut ourselves up in a closet for the rest of our lives, we have a new experience every single day. And even still, some children found a whole other world by walking through a closet once upon a time.

So here's to standing up and looking around. To really taking in the world around me, to seeing the beauty of life that has been placed in front of me. No more ignoring, no more passivity. I'll know my name as it's called again.

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